Break ups – most of us have gone thru them. some take it badly, some just breeze thru the process and bump out with another around their arms. There’s another very common situtation – when one party refuses to accept the break up and is trying their hardest to win his or her ex over..

Wat are the rules of engagement for this situation?

  1. Are you allowed to still be in touch, stay in talking terms? Yes. Provided that both of you are over each other, ready to move on. if one wants to leave while the other is still begging to make-up, then no need la (this is if breaking up is the best thing for the both of you). it will just complicate things if both parties stay in talking terms -one trying to be diplomatic and casual, the other taking every chance to reminisce and rekindle past moments in hopes of igniting wat is already lost.
  2. Stalk your ex? That’s a big obese fat NO!!. it is scary and will just flush whatever small bit of chance you “think” you have to patch things up down that Johnson Suisse toilet bowl!. So please, accept the break up, move on and DON’T be a stalker.
  3. Pestering your ex to explain again & again the reason for the break-up? If the other party has explained him/herself as to the reasons for the break-up, then accept it, argue it out if you want to, but just there and then, dont keep bringing it up-sending emails, texts, or force every call to dwindle into the subject. if someone wants out- that’s just it, she wants out. no two way about it.
  4. What if the reason for the break-up was because your partner cheated on you, then are you allowed to open your closet of weapons and turn his/her life into a living hell?  Yes, I guess. but only if you yourself have been loyal, truthful. If you pun have cheated on your partner in the past-then i say “what goes around comes around”. Scary isnt it – but yea. Cheating on your partner is the worst thing you could do – the scar and damage is permanent. it is the toughest thing to rebuild the trust.
  5. Try your extreme best to impress your ex in hopes of getting her back? This would work if the only thing your ex was looking for is a hot car, hot property and hard cash. Cos then probably, working your ass off to get all of the above, wud get her in your arms again, but if the issues that led her to break up with u are huge- something she cant budge on, then dont waste your time and hers. just move on. impress someone else.
  6. Jump up and down just to get her attention? No need! Cos yea. she’ll notice you but that’s about it. just like she’d notice someone walking in front of her.

It is harder said than done to just move on, but pestering, and pushing for things to “get back to the way they were” is just going to make things worst. instead of being able to be friends, your ex might just shut you out completely. the sky will be clearer after a while, let things run its course and dont force it. only my 2 cents.