human Prozac

Work has been hectic. Just hectic. Mrs Foo knows well enough, cos she can hear my sudden cries of agony, to which she will laugh and say “still working on it ar?” and I dreadfully reply with whatever energy left in me “yes”.  

If it werent for the following, I would have knocked on the door of cuckoodom a while ago 1)  I actually like my job 2) I have swell, and i mean swell colleagues! 3) the New Yorker and his amusing ways of keeping me company online.

The week has just started to calm down , this is relative to the last few weeks. So, by calm i dont mean not having anything to do. I still have loads, but I can work at it at a not so hectic pace.

It is very comforting to have someone you can turn to and find immediate solace in at times like this. I should know, cos I have used my perks of having a boyfriend to the fullest the last few weeks. And I am beyond berterima kasih that he has so patiently listened to my rants and helped calm my nerves. Must la kan, kata he’s my boyfriend haha.

Well its going to be hectic again soon,its kinda exciting although admittedly tiring.  Ah well..

 The New Yorker picked me up from work yesterday and greeted me with some cupcakes from Wondermilk .

the Sartorialist

The Sartorialist is a blog that I religiously visit everyday. I do, for the many styles featured and the amazing fashion photography. Some below..

  

rule of thumb – need one?

I was talking to a good friend of mine a few nights ago. And our conversation made a stop at the ever so famous subject “Relationship – How do you go about em?”

My friend posed a question, how do we determine what are the things we can or cannot do when in a relationship ie. what are the things that are ok to do and which ones fall under the category of big NO..ie the acts that  that would make our partners go insanely angry – flip la basically.

I replied almost instantaneously, that I follow this particular rule of thumb/philosophy

 ”Do unto others as you would have others do unto you”

This saying, a famous one, is so beautiful and apt that it is applicable to all and sundry, not just your loved ones. But it is particularly apt when used to guide your relationship.

Asking for your partner’s permission - yes or no?

Well it depends, if it works for your relationship, then by all means, do it. Cos I do it – not asking for permission per se la. I will just drop the New Yorker a text/call and inform him that I’ve got eg. dinner plans with who and who, ask if he’d like to tag along etc.

If I got a dinner invitation from someone who clearly has the hots for me, then I will on my own decline the invitation politely. No need la to ask the New Yorker. I know women, well men sometimes, tell their partner about suitors or “admirers” that are around for one of the following reasons:

•  tell your partner about Mr A cos you wanna tell him that something’s up but you have it under control
• tell your partner about Mr A cos you just wanna make him jealous and get him on his toes

Reason (1) is ok. Reason (2), well if you inform your partner about a 3rd party for reason 2, then you gotta ask yourself,what is it that you really want? if its to get his attention, then that needs to be followed up with another question, is it a deficit of attention from your partner or are you just needy? cos if its a case of attention deficit from your partner then raise the issue, but if you’re needy..then that’s a whole different ball game..try being less needy perhaps?

Ok back to the “declining the invitation for dinner from someone who has the hots for me” situation. well the reason why its easy to come to that decision of action is thanks to the rule of thumb – I would ask myself, would I be ok with my partner going out for dinner with some chick who has the hots and has been hitting on him?” No! Flat out. So, likewise, need I ask the New Yorker if he’d be ok with me goin out on a dinner date with I-have-the-hots-for-Nadia guy? Nope. So save yourself and your partner from the silly argument “oh why cant I go, we’re just friends, and I know how to control the situation” blah blah blah

Above all, I feel it is of utmost importance that you have respect for each other and DO NOT at any point in time, treat your partner as a second class citizen in the relationship. Dont pull a “I can do what I want to do, as I please, when I please, but when it comes to you, you have to run it by me first, if I say ok, then ok, if not, no”. That’s just being plain despotic, and shallow.

You’re not in a relationship with a dog. Even with a dog, if you push it to a corner one too many times, am sure on one not so fine day, it’ll just bite your head off and every other limb on your unfortunate body. Padan muka. Same goes with your partner, he or she may try to understand or tolerate it for a while, but if you continue with your despotic ways then soon you’ll see your partner walking away and never turning back. The only partner suited for a despotic person is a robot.

Then there was another queation ..is it ok to feel jealous?

Yes. And I think these days, amongst menfolk, and perhaps women as well, there’s this mistake of automatically equating jealousy as a sign of mistrust, which I think is a bit off. It can be a sign, but its not automatic that just cause you’re feeling jealous, you dont trust your partner.

 You can perfectly trust your partner yet still feel jealous. Although I have to admit, too much of everything, or doing an extreme on everything is dangerous:

Trust blindly, and you might end up with a nasty surprise

Dont trust at all, you might as well not have a relationship

Be a green eyed jealous monster all the time, you’ll get the words “Clingy, insecure” stamped on your forehead

Dont feel jealous at all, then you should ask yourself..whether you really love your partner or not?

So guys, if your partner gets jealous, dont immediately let that old line slip off your tongue “Do you not trust me?” Please la, turn the sophistication level up a notch and stop being so cliche-ish.

then there was a final question “sigh..what do women want in a relationship?”

Speaking for myself- companionship fused with lots of love and trust.

Treat your partner right -that is key.

You gotta know what you want in your relationship, and what you seek for in a partner. If you want a partner who has a good head on her shoulders, carries herself well, has values, then seek out for someone like that, and when you find her, treat her with respect. There’s a Malay saying “masuk kandang kambing mengembek, masuk kandang singa mengaum” So same goes, if she’s a lady, treat her like one, dont speak to her like she’s a slut cos if you do that, 3 things are for certain – she’ll be very offended, she definitely wont think highly of you, and eventually she’ll leave you.

Same goes for you ladies, dont cripple him with your whines and continous nagging, he’s not looking for a mummy figure. You want a man, then treat him like one. But to the men out there, please la, there is nothing wrong or unmanly or “tak macho” about being a gentlemen ie listening to reasons, admitting fault, compromising, always making sure she walks by your side not behind you..etc

Ah talk on relationships can go on forever. anyways above are my 2 cents

Some things you just dont share

A lot of things have happened lately, all of which involve intense emotions and thought. I wish I could pour it out here, on my blog that has not been fed with any posts for a while now, but unfortunately I cant. Some things remain strictly in the private files of Nadia. To those of you that have been checking out my blog and have been greeted by the same stuff, am so sorry and thanks for still clicking on JustNadia. Will publish some posts soon.

December babies

I know a ton of people who were born in December [I'm a December baby too, 26th December hint hint hehe].. that means buying and wrapping a ton of birthday gifts, and attending birthday parties..woohoo!

the first December baby burthday celeb is this Saturday. Have yet to shop for the perfect gift for a metrosexual guy, I find it slightly harder when metrosexual is part of the consideration criteria. Acca Kappa comb?

But the good thing about shopping for December pressies is that the Christmas offers are out and on. There’s a pretty good variety of offers for Christmas, which makes shopping for pressies a tad easier.

Not being a cheapo for buying season offers, but when there are 5 december babies in the extended family, another 8 december baby friends, and on top of that gifts for friends that are celebrating Christmas…that adds up to quite a bit on the pressie bill.

Well, good luck shopping to me. I’m going to have to start soon.

On my list of Most Romantic Songs

Dewi by Dewa 

Sweetlicious Book

It arrived last Wednesday. My very own copy. Thanks Jill!

Iftar at Mama Wa’s

Last night we had iftar at Mama Wa’s house, my aunt- mum’s sister [dont know how Mama Wa came about, my aunt's name is Sarah..Sarah to Mama Wa? ;p]

Anyway almost everyone was there, and there was soo much food! All about FOOD! ;p

Below is my grandmum’s signature kuih lopis – unbeatably delicious! My grandmum would happily watch us gobble them down while saying “Nice ar nenek make the kuih lopis”. Ya Nek, we totally agree with you!

I’m about to do the “categories” thingy for iftar, cos i find it both an interesting and funny observation that at every iftar there’ll always be..[here comes the categories]

1. the person that’ll the first to pick up a plate and line it with dishes and kuih, then find a spot and wait for the azan – last night that person was my cousin Iqral haha
2. the person that will call out “ok dah Azan!”, eventhough we could all hear it loud and clear on the TV or from the nearby mosque – no one did that last night hehe, but at home it’ll be my brother.
3. & someone who would always go “lambatnya Azan” or “I think dah Azan dah” – I believe more than one person falls in this category LOL! [ i do it too sometimes, especially when I'm extra hungry]
4. the first person to tapau [pack] the food for sahur – that would be Donnie ;p
5. and the two groups – first group; the ones that would take a small bite then pray Mahgrib before continuing iftar and second group; those that would eat first then pray Mahgrib – i fall in the first group, cos I like to take my time savouring the dishes during iftar *wink*

See if you have the same categoy of peeps at home. I’m sure you do- at least one of them.

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Below – murtabak..a must have for iftar

We left Mama Wa’s around 10pm, after some tea, bowls of bubur kacang, scoops of  Mama Wa’s famous trifle and a bag of Australian chips [ very good chips!]- Shasha brought em. Now we all know what to ask Eski to bring back when he comes home for visits!

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There’s one guarantee whenever there’s a dinner party, pot luck or any sort of makan at Mama Wa’s – you can be sure there’ll be goood food!

Pritha

At this hour last week I got news from Madame that Pritha had passed away. I was lost for words, stumped..and for a few minutes the only thing I could utter was what Oh My God..Oh My God why.. how.. when?

Cos two nights earlier, we were out with her for Suhana’s farewell, laughing at her sharp one liners…enjoying each other’s company in the Bisek Bisek. 

She seemed so normal..no signs to show that she was going to say goodbye to all of us.

She was a dear friend to many and also to the SC.

SC was quiet last week..everyone trying to accept her tragic death..her life ended in her own home..hit by her own car.

We attended the service last Thursday…church was full. It was testimony to her big heart and the many friends she made.

I wasnt close to Pritha, Friday night was the first time I was out with her. Previously my interactions with her were sporadic..birthdays at the office, or when I needed info on our internal audit process.

But I couldn’t help but feel a sense of loss.

“Life is short so live it to the fullest” As cliche as it sounds. It holds barrels of truth.

Say i love you to those that you love

Show that you love them

Apologise to those that you have wronged

Love yourself and make a difference

Pritha left us. She left like the rest..reminding us that this life is not permanent.

I’m glad I was out with her that Friday and sent her back to SC that night after dinner. I heard her say

“Bye Nadia, thanks for the ride..I’ll see you on Monday!”

Little did I know then that I wasn’t meant to see her…not on Monday or ever again.

She’ll be remembered and missed by many.

Above: Pritha with Shireen

Raihan

Raihan called again yesterday

She calls once a week, she insists that she calls cos in her words

“It’s dirt cheap Dya, takpa biaq aku call hang” [she still maintains her Kedah slang, though she's now living in Canberra ;p]

Whatever the arrangement , so long as we get to be in the loop of the what, when and whos who in our lives. Raihan picks the weirdest time to call…while I’m at work, and so far each time it’s about 20 min before i’m about to enter a meeting. Perfect timing.

 Raihan and I go a loong way back-let me share some of the highlights:

• our trip to South Africa for the Worlds Debating Championship, and to the mall in Stellenbosch hunting for cili padi [yes in South Africa] cos the food was so bland  and Raihan especially had no selera makan haha.

• we won the Women’s Ivy hosted by MMU [we were a smashing team!]

• the many sleepovers spent chatting, debating, and NOT sleeping

• my SOS cries for help and her SOS cries

• the arguments and misunderstandings [any normal friendship must have its share of this]

• being her bride’s maid, and spending the time in Kedah with her and her family [including in-laws ;p]

the list is endless, she has been there for me through my high and lows, and she STILL is.

She’s been telling me to move to Canberra [perhaps I will ;p] and she picked Canberra as my honey moon spot too [umm can consider].

Ahh yes..Raihan Chapman.. who now plays soccer in winter on Sundays, and was voted the Best Player at her last game is a great friend…a sister. Can’t wait to catch her and Andrew in November.

AT

From today onwards, Alina Tong will be a friend. Before today she wasn’t just a friend but also my boss. A terrific one at that.

The first time I met her, my eyes immediately spot the 3 row piercings on each of her ears filled with spunk studs..that just wrote funky all over her face. I have a thing for piercings, spotting some of my own..not too many on the ears though, I’ve got small ears so single piercing is enough. 

Alina will be migrating toAustralia in July.

I popped by her office last night and thought I’d give her a hand at packing up her stuff..all the 10 years worth of work at the SC. It was a pretty emotional process…we sorted all the stuff into stacks ..Shred, File, Throw, Nadia . Yup everybody had their own stack of inheritance… guidelines, reference files,books,reports..each for our different portfolios.

 the stacks..

Ahh yes we will all remember Alina for amongst others her..

Zesty Smile

Anytime you knock on her door (which is always open by the way) and pop your head in, without fail you will be greeted by a smile. All the while that I’ve worked under her stewardship I have never ever not gotten that smile. And I appreciated it a lot cos it made me feel comfortable to approach her with any matter, whether to be discussed, for her decision or just for some guidance.

This smile is flashed by a person that has 1000 different things on her plate. It’s different when someone behind a movie ticket counter flashes you a smile, cos I doubt printing out movie tickets is a nerve wrecking, pressure filled job. But when you’re responsible to head the Market Development Department of the SC,it’s a whole different ball game.

So when she can flash a smile while running multiple capital market issues in her head..then that’s something to shout out loud about.

 the colgate smile

High Speed Processor

Our department manages a wide array of portfolios…natural for a department called Market Development.

The department deals with amongst others bilateral/multilateral agreements, fund management, derivatives, corporate governance, venture capital.. the list really just goes on.

This is where Alina’s high speed processor is valuable ..and which all of us are thankful for, cos it makes the delivery of our work easier and faster.She can switch modes from discussing structured products to foreign fund management license in just a split second.

And attend one meeting after the other to thrash out entirely different issues..mind you again this is not like a wedding planner meeting one bride then  another discussing flower arrangements..Jane would like tulips, Fatimah wants African daisies..blah! But the materials Alina has to deal with can sometimes be very technical and it’s amazing the depository of info she has.

Big hearty laugh

When Alina laughs she really laughs. It’s difficult  to describe. It’s not the irritating “shut up I can’t stand it” kinda laugh but more the “this is bloody funny and it deserves a real laugh” kinda laugh. Aarrghh u just have to hear her laugh then you’d get it.

Her don’t worry-be happy attitude

So far, I’ve not seen her buckle under pressure. And believe me the work pressure is there all the time and often reach those insane peaks. But she’s cool as a cucumber..that’s a quality I’d love my bosses to have, and she did.

It’s crucial cos if the head of the ship panics then the rest of the crew can’t count on the captain for any sort of direction, and can just prepare to mati lemas..haha.

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But above all that.. she’s a dedicated mother who makes it a point to go back to her house which is an envious  5 minutes away from the office, and tuck little  Chayanne for her afternoon nap, and she makes sure that when her kids get up in the morning, she’s the first person they see…not their Indonesian Bibi’.

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“Life goes on, and all of you must continue to work hard” A simple advise from her..but one that I can bet my last penny on will be relevant even in a hundred years to come.

Alina has given me countless opportunities to enrich myself, continued to challenge me and gave me exposure to the dynamic mechanics of the capital market, that I’ve yet to fully grasp.. and I’m grateful for it.

She will be missed for her wonderful leadership qualities, progressive thinking and cheerful demeanour.

I tell everyone that she’s a great boss, she indeed is, and also without a doubt a remarkable person.

The work and effort will continue at the department and the SC  like always..

as for Alina..

like she said..this isn’t goodbye..it’s till we meet again.

All the best AT. 

 one last look before she leaves…

off she goes.

Passing

I received sad news last Sunday -that a dear friend Adiba Shareen’s father had past away. I couldn’t be there to visit her and her family as I was away.

My thoughts and prayers goes out to your late father, to you and your siblings Deeb.

Al- Fatihah.

who’s the girl behind the shades?

A few friends have asked me about my header pic..

“Dya..Nad is that you in the sunglasses?”

“Nad is that you in your vinatage sunglasses? “ 

Yes people it’s me.

When this pic was taken..I was wearing Zoey’s sunglasses..then lurvely Zoey got me a pair..i loike!!

Anyone wanna guess who’s head is that next to mine? haha

Mini Terror

The car I hope to own someday..love the classic look of the old mini but the newbie Mini has an evergreen spunk that I’m crazy about. Often imagine myself driving one to Johor to save the seahorses *wink*

  What my brothers used to drive, each of the twin had a mini, one red and the other green (fitted with working air con, new seats and paint job). I enjoyed the rides in the car… the Strokes blasting through the speakers, holding my breath while my brother takes a bend at high speed with ease…driving on the fast lane. Fun!

Unfortunately they had to turn the Minis in for Satrias cos the Minis couldn’t handle the travel./distance. Cyberjaya to Shah Alam..was quite far..well Cyberjaya to anywhere is far to me.

Dont get me wrong, am thankful for what I have..the wheels that I’m driving now is great.

But this car..it’s just one of a kind.

Kanna- for crunchy leaves and sotong

The restaurant might have been there for a while already but I’ve never been to Restoran Kanna in Seksyen 17,PJ (behind Lisa De Inn Hotel).I hope I spelled it right, Kanna,Khanna..I’m confusing it with Khanna Penna. Anyways according to Azrina their sotong goreng is the best. So we went there for lunch.

It was packed with office peeps, but the restaurant had ample eating areas, outside under the shady trees, indoor-air conditioned and indoor-no air conditioning. Free to choose.

We Khatulistiwa ladies can’t stand the heat so we opted for the air conditioned area. It’s weird, when I’m at the beach I looovveee being in the Sun but when I’m in town I turn into a puteri lilin..weird weird.

The sotong goreng was indeed good . In Kanna the sotong is fried with onion and curry leaves, which gives a nice curry-oniony taste (duh)..and the leaves are also crunchy for it to be eaten on its own.

The rest had rice while I had roti canai (have not had one in weeks)- for the roti..I prefer the one in Rajus (next to Lasalle PJ). Dont mind paying what some would call a premium for their roti. It’s sedap and soft.

Oh yes..apart from the food.. be warned- the workers in Kanna are VERY persistent. Its a normal phenomenon in these type of restaurants to have different waiters carry different trays with different dishes…fish cutlets, thairu, all sorts of gravy, fried fish, fried chilli etc. and they’d go around offering them to the patrons. Well if you think a simple shake of your head and a “no thanks + smile” will do the trick like it usually does…well it wont in Kanna.

I felt like standing on my chair just now and making a small announcement “Perhatian kepada semua pekerja-pekerja Kanna, we do not want ANYTHING else except for the items that we’ve ordered, terima kasih”. Crazy? haha Well they were very persistent..it’s as though they get paid a commission for each item they manage to put on the customer’s tab (wait do they?)

So be prepared to put a stern no-and-i-mean-NO face. Luckily the determined waiters gig is only for the first 10 minutes..then you are left in peace to enjoy your meal.Aah

Parking is a breeze, just slot 60 cents in the meter if you’re scared you’d kena saman. Not hard to find either, 12 oclock at the Rothman roundbout if you’re from Jaya supermarket, straight on, up a slope then immediate right when you see the shoplots.

The food’s ok, not as much variety of fish as Rajus and the outside eating area is not as cosy as Rajus too. It’s obvious isn’t it that I’m a big fan of Rajus ;p

But the sotong goreng with curry leaves is a must try..oh yea and also the kuah ketam.

Restoran Kanna = 2 thumbs up (out of 5 if you were wondering ;p)

Kiki and Boo

My brother brings them home occasionally- the 2 adorable furry rascals…Kiki and Boo. Barely a few months old, and they’re already so big, and heavy. Very very playful, they’d hop on bed with me, lie on their backs and wait for a tickle or tummy rub, criss cross around our legs when we walk, and I thought cats hate water,.but these 2 love getting wet, Nasha picks them up and craddle them like babies..she’s sending subtle hints to me to quicky get married and have kids..haha. Soon piggy :p

And Boo has a funny habit (can I call it that?)..she sticks out her tongue like a dog, panting..no it’s not because she’s thirsty..we checked.and she wags her tail everytime she’s excited. Doesnt that sound like something dogs would do?

 Maybe it’s just me..am not too familiar with cats..but her habit is very peculiar…cute but a bit too dog like..hihi.

They’ll be going back with my brother soon..it’s fun having them around..and I prefer the occasional visits..cos am a bit lazy to clean up their litter trays after they drop a bomb. The house will be quiet once they’ve gone back..no more ringing of bell collars or Kiki waiting in the morning to enter my room .

They’ll come around again, and next time I’m gonna have some cute cat tank tops to fit them in.

Power of the Sea Cucumber

Was at the Curve yesterday evening with my sister and we stopped by forest’secret. I read about the store earlier and wanted to see what they had to offer. All natural products that work..this I must see.

forest’secret like I said offers all traditional-natural resources based products, with ingredients like sirih, gamat (sea cucumber), halia etc. They’ve got supplements, body & skin care and some foodstuff. Suplements- mainly from gamat. Langkawi people must be rich selling all the gamat ;p

The interior of the shop has a clean/minimalist finishing to it-something like Body Shop. It’s a good setting. Shelves all around, and a sink in the middle (yea very like Body Shop).They’ve also got some jars of cookies to sample in one corner…so help yourselves.. the nutmeg cookie’s not bad.

forest’secret is yet to have a wide variety of products..just one range of skin care, and one set of shampoo and conditioner (inai/henna=main ingredient) for all hair types, and the body care offers only sabun lulur and taharah (mud soap).

So don’t ecxpect to walk into the store and see rows and rows of items to pick and sample, the Indonesian small stores that sell jamu type A-Z  boasts quantity/variety..quality?? hmm I dont dare say..*wink*

But having said that forest’secret should be given credit for their effort with packaging. Maybe not as fancy as L’occitane, but it’s far better than some of the dodgy packaging at the little jamu stores..haha.

 I made a purchase of the “Sea Cucumber Gel with Aloe Vera” and a set of shampoo. I can only testify for the gel, cos I used it on an unwelcomed pimple last night. It works!

This morning, the pimple made a much awaited exit from my face. This wonder of a gel is a must have for skin care regime.  It’s priced at RM22 for a small tube. I count my blessings cos I dont have an acute acne or skin problem but like most ladies, I do get the sporadic breakouts..(dont we hate them ladies)..well now no fear nor worry cos I’ve found a pimple-buster that does what it boasts it’ll do. Yeay!!

forest’secret is still young, but I’m sure in months to come they’ll have more products  and if they’re as good as the gel.. then they’ve got a customer in me!